Enjoying Yeshua

A few thoughts have been going through my mind this week. It's all because I think too much.

Prior to this post, I wanted to post another called "Ruthless" but it didn't sit well with me.

Why 'ruthless'?

Just a few days ago, I determined in myself - my self thoughts went like this:- Does not the Word says gird your mind? Meditate on the word day and night, keep them in the midst of your heart for they are health and life! To be in the world but not of the world and hence to bring every thought captive to the word of Christ. My heart shall belong to Jesus and Jesus alone! To keep myself for my Beloved; to live only for Him. To cherish the Word and my inheritance for it came at a great price.

But even as I was thinking on this, it didn't feel quite right.

Where is love and compassion? But we don't walk by feelings right?

Then again, would not being 'ruthless' be like the pharisees? Saul was a pharisee of pharisees - though his heart was for God. Well, I want my heart to be for the Lord but I sure as heaven don't want to be a pharisee. Jesus reserved the harshest words for pharisees. He called them "a brood of vipers"

But I'm not talking about being 'ruthless' to others but to self. Cruxifying the flesh so to speak. And I'm reminded, that it is NOT me who does the cruxifying; that I am cruxified (past tense) with Christ, therefore I no longer live, Jesus Christ now lives in me. And the life that I live, I live to the son of God.

Perhaps because my motivation, this 'ruthlessness', stems from fear. That of anyone taking the place of Jesus in my heart. I have lived life without Christ and am living life with Him. And I can't fathom, how I will be able, having once tasted the sweetness to turn away from such majesty and love. I wouldn't be able to bear it. And hence, I subconsciously told myself that nobody can touch my heart. And of course, in some ways, I was putting myself under law for the more I thought about it, the more afraid I was that I would one day fall to temptation.

It's like commanding someone not to think of a pink elephant and saying it in his face repeatedly. Of course, in that someone's mind would be a pink elephant.

Then a few days ago, I was listening to Pastor Lawrence's message. And it really resonated with me and brought me back to 'basics'. Ahh... 'basics', what an oxymoron of a word. 'Basics' can be so profound.

Pastor Lawrence was sharing that he can be doing the 'christian' things.. still being in the Word, reading the bible, praying, attending for service. I know that, I do that; because I WANT to. I want to know more and more about Jesus Christ. About Him. And I ask Abba for the hunger as well. But it didn't satisfy me enough.

And through Pastor's sharing, I realised why.

I'm reading the Word, praying, attending service for knowledge. But I've forgotten the main reason that I do all these things is to ENJOY Yeshua. To breath in His fragrance and savour Him; to admire the perfection of His work and His majestic beauty. To be refreshed and reminded of His love. To go, not to a book, but to Him alone and drink of His living waters. That I may not thirst.

All these things that we do culminate to only one purpose. Enjoying Jesus. Enjoying Yeshua. Just that one thing. To sit at His feet and listen and rest and draw from His fullness.

Not to focus on myself. Not to depend on myself to keep myself for Christ. For surely, it is Jesus who holds me, not I Him. It is God who has put me in Christ, not me. It is the finished work that guarantees eternal reconciliation with Him, not me. It is His love that sustains me, not my love for Him.

Back to basics. Back to enjoying Jesus. His love keeps my heart for Him alone.


Psalm 27:1, 4-6

The LORD is my light and my salvation;
Whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the strength of my life;
Of whom shall I be afraid?...

One thing I have desired of the LORD,
That will I seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the LORD
All the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the LORD,
And to inquire in His temple.

For in the time of trouble
He shall hide me in His pavilion;
In the secret place of His tabernacle
He shall hide me;
He shall set me high upon a rock.

And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me;
Therefore I will offer sacrifices of joy in His tabernacle;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the LORD.